How to spot your visibility blocksDec 30, 2023
The most common hurdle to overcoming visibility blocks is actually seeing them. They’re so embedded in the way we think, the way we act, the way we respond to people, that they don’t seem like blocks at all.
They seem like ‘Just the way life is’.
So in the interests of not being bogged down by visibility blocks for the rest of time, here’s a useful tip for spotting a block; What behaviour really annoys you?
Perhaps it’s sales funnels – you just can’t stand people selling to you or hosting webinars where they sell something at the end or mention the product they have for sale in a live video.
Rather than raging against the machine, here’s a question to ponder; How comfortable am I with selling my service/product/program?
A fear of being judged when you ask for a sale is a huge visibility block that impacts significantly on your capacity to earn money. It’s a visibility block that causes a money problem.
Perhaps the thing that really gets your goat is when women in power don’t support other women?
I hear you.
I’ve always had a special place in my heart for the Madeleine Albright quote; ‘There’s a special place in hell for women who don’t help other women.’
That being said, when I’m really annoyed or triggered by someone else’s behaviour – when it really pushes my buttons – I’m not operating from the fullness of my power. So, after noticing the resistance, I remind myself to turn within.
And I ask the question; What good girl behaviour am I imposing on other women?
‘Good feminists’ are just as trapped in good girl conditioning as good mothers, good daughters and good friends.
One of the ways feminism eats itself from within from time to time, is by not allowing a multiplicity of voices and forms of expression.
The imposition of ‘one right way’ keeps you and others in a straight jacket. I’m convinced that more women would speak up about women’s issues if only:
- they didn’t feel like they had to be a perfect feminist,
- and know all the data on women, and/or
- know the exact right perspective to adopt at any moment to keep themselves on the right side of feminism.
Because visibility blocks are as much about permission as they are anything else.
If other people’s behaviour is annoying you, taking the time to consider what they’re allowing themselves that you’re not, can be just the insight you need to help you spot a visibility block.